My belle...

We go back a long way....I remember the first time i met you. You were in your JC uniform. Wasn't sure what to make of you. Other memories include hearing your loud commanding voice shouting at R from time to time. "LIANG!", you would go, defying him to disobey you. I would almost shiver in terror upon hearing your loud roar, often suppressing the urge to look at your face whenever you barked a command at R. In all honesty, i must admit that while i didn't exactly have a bad first impression of you, neither did i have a good one. I always thought that it must have been difficult for R to have a third parent in the house, on top of the usual two.

In the few years that ensued, my mind draws a blank. I only vaguely remember you as a sporty person, capable of playing all sorts of sports with mean vigour. I remember you playing basketball with a mean throw and with no fear of bashing your way through a line of guys. I did not fancy playing against you. You were always, when in a rivalling team, a force to be reckoned with, not just among the girls, but among the guys as well. And you know what, i think the guys felt that too. You were, i think, in my mind always strong. In personality and in will. And i think, that is something that will not change with time. And i think, that is one of the reasons why i admire you so much.

During uni days, although we were in the same uni and serving in the same campus ministry, we were both very busy in our own domains. We didn't spend much time hanging out, though from time to time i remember dropping by your hostel room for a chat or a visit. I remember marvelling at how cosy you always manage to make your room look and feel, and how people around always love dropping in on you to say hi. In that time, i think we both kinda disappeared from serving in church because of all our campus ministry and commitments, but i was glad that we both stuck on and never left Glory. We continued to hold on to Glory and to YF/YA in spite of the fast-departing numbers.

I think towards the end of uni days, we both returned to choir. You first i think. You made choir a lot more enjoyable. We were the only two altos. Strange thing was, we both weren't REAL altos. We volunteered because there was a shortage and on some level, i think we both wanted the challenge. It was DEFINITELY more difficult singing the alto parts. But i really enjoyed it, esp with you there. Together, i think we were louder than the sops combined sometimes. Haha...But of course, i'd attribute that to your God-given volume in voice. I could never compare with you. Hee. Around that time, i think we were also teaching in the Sunday school together. You were in there first, and i came in on 'probation'. Happily attached myself to your class and we had such great fun laughing at the antics and eccentricities of our kids. Oh, speaking of which, i suddenly remembered the time we were both sitting in a pool (was it A's pool??) and you suddenly blurted out this question that gave me a shock. Ha....do u remember? I shan't say it out now =) But i remember i said, "Err....aren't u skipping a few steps here??" Heh. I shall always remember our Sunday School teaching times....the songs, the actions, the bible stories....all these i enjoyed all the more because you were there with me...

Then came the dark ages...This was when you were in TP and in your first year of teaching afterward. I was in NIE. You made me feel quite scared when you went into your crying fits. I remember that you were really having a bad time, and i started to wonder if i had made a mistake signing the bond.....i remember sending you home in my car, our long talks about everything and anything. I remember our crying in the car, talks about our struggles and love-lives, whether bad or non-existent. It was about this time, that we came to the conclusion that it was time to have a cg. For sharing and for accountability and growth in Christ. I think we talked about it many times before it was finally put into action. And i was glad when it finally materialised.

Ahhh....CG times. So memorable. Getting used to one anothers' antics and eccentric behaviour didn't take all that long. CG was always a laugh. I really enjoyed it. Though there were times of tension, we grew closer and the time of bonding was really great. I learnt a lot from you, and i saw how you grew rapidly in the Lord. You were no longer the same bespectacled girl in JC uniform that i knew from YF times. You had matured and toned-down into a godly woman. A woman after God's own heart. An encourager and one i could turn to in times of need. You were such a comfort and support to me, in more ways than you knew. Having you around always made me feel more comforted. It wasn't until reality set in, when you no longer appeared in CG, that i realised your role in CG. You were the pillar. A strong, reassuring one. I shall miss you very very much in the time you're not here.

I shall miss your laughter, no one else's laughter could compare with mine and overpower mine. Together we make the invincible duo. I shall miss your cooking...your cookies, popiah parties, soba, baked salmon.....I shall miss going to your house any and every time i need to talk to you.....i shall miss nuahing with you at your house, watching vcds and laughing at stupid people doing stupid things on tv.....i shall miss suan-ning pple like H with you and going into fits of laughter over her cluelessness and lost and helpless expressions. I shall miss the wordless communication with you, how we can miraculously understand what each other is thinking without having to say it.

Dear Michelle, though i can't say that life can't go on without you, i can say (and i know)that life will be very different without you, your laughter and your love. I know that God has a purpose for you and i know that your life will never be the same again after your two years of service in Thailand. We will support you in whatever way we can, and visit your family in your absence. Sorry in advance, for the times we can't be physically there for you when you're lonely, upset or need a shoulder to cry on. But i know God will supply for your every need in ways you can't even begin to imagine. Dear friend and sister....you don't have to worry that we'll forget you as life goes on back here in Singapore without you. You have a place in our hearts that will never disappear though you're not physically here. I love you very very much, and i know many others do too. So don't you forget that. If you don't mind my long emails (you know how long-winded i am), i'll update you on every detail in my life. Down to the growth of my little toenail, if you wish. Heh.

Take care of yourself my dear...don't overwork yourself as you often do. Give our love to that Thais too...

*hugs*
jas